For those that don't know me well, I travel for work. And its hard to balance working and being a momma. I used to travel every week and took a role for the current year where I travel about 1-2 times a month instead. My husband also travels for work 100% of the week. Needless to say, we have spent the past few months figuring out a new routine and balancing crazy travel, airplanes, nap times, family time, bedtime, and trying to find time for friends and romance. I looked around and realized a lot of my momma friends work and figured I'd share some of the best tips I've learned from them and my time so far.
This week I'm talking about being a momma who needs help and has become okay with asking for it. I'll do some additional posts on: toddler snacks, keeping a convenient nursery, my "go-live" checklist for new mommas on the countdown for their new babe AND my downloadable baby registry checklist! throughout this month, too! Everything to help make new working mommas live's easier!!
The hardest thing I had to do when I came back from maternity leave was to realize that even though some days I felt I was on top of the world, crushing the working momma thing, there were still days were I felt so swamped, so behind, and really just needed some help. When I went back into the workforce, suddenly it was like there was WAY MORE laundry to do, dirty dishes just seemed to pop up out of no-where (which means more unloading of the dishwasher - the horror) and my dogs magically started to shed more and I somehow spent less time working out and more time trying to get some extra 30 minutes of sleep. The yard was over 6 inches long and the hubby would go out in the middle of the 100+ degrees heat to mow, dreaming of our old lazy weekends and vacations, only to come inside to me frantically trying wipe down a highchair because the baby was finally napping and we needed to head out to some swim lessons right after. I think in some ways, we all want to have it all. But we can't have everything all at the same time.
So the hubby and I sat down to have an honest conversation about asking for help. We made a list of all of our chores and what we could do, what we could afford to outsource, and what things that if they didn't happen at all, we would be okay with. Our musings are below and hopefully serve as some encouragement to other families trying to figure out how to create your own version of what having it all means right now, too <3
Things That Were Non-Negotiable for Us to Keep Doing
1. Family meals - instead of always cooking, we started a new tradition of going out to lunch once a weekend to spend time with the 3 of us AND to avoid having to spend time cooking/cleaning at home
2. Eating Healthy - we started to order from snap kitchen, where healthy and food prep become one. You can get a free meal (if you're local to Austin or any of their other locations by using my code kbag-46x at checkout!)
3. Date Night - we started doing monthly date night exchanges with our neighbors. Babysitters regularly really add up so we do a kiddo swap 1 night a week with our neighbors where we take their babe or they take ours and we each go out on a 'date night' and come home to a happy, sleeping babe
4. Relaxation - I started getting a massage once a month. It sounds trivial but it's really made a difference to get a little bit pampered.
Things We Outsourced & FREE MONEY FOR YOU TO DO SO, TOO!
1. Cleaning - we did 2 things. We hired an amazing housekeeper who comes 2 times a month AND go a robotic vaccum, Neato. Game charger to spend less time scrubbing tubs and picking up dog fur and more time hanging out with each other
2. Meal Prep - eating healthy, but having little time to do so is hard. Blue Apron is doing a Whole30 September, so I signed us up for 3 meals for 2 for the month at a discount of $40 total. Way cheaper than eating out, super healthy, and skips the need to get groceries. Oh, and my friends at Blue Apron are giving you $40 your first order - basically free food for 3 days - so go enjoy using this link and code at checkout
3. Grocery delivery - yes, I am just that lazy. Or resourceful. For $125 a year Instacart delivers my groceries from Costco, Sams Club, HEB, Whole Foods, Central Market, Specs / Total Wine and More, Walgreens or CVS and some other gems for FREE. Yes, you read that right. As long as I spent $35 (which, I always do), you get free delivery in as little as 1 hour. No lines. No membership cards. And its delivered right to your door....or wine fridge :P So here is a $10 gift card from my friends there, too! Use this link or my code at checkout. Code is TBAGGERLY3
Things That We Choose to Sometime Let Slip
1. Lessons - we tried to do the whole swim lessons and take baby to fun splash pads, museums, etc but honestly y'all it got too hard to have some adventure planned every weekend. Some weekends you just want to stay inside, hide from the 107 degree weather and snuggle. So we stop pressuring ourselves and just let ourselves live in the moment. Game changer.
2. Yoga - you're probably reading that and thinking "what the heck?" ...well let me explain. Yoga is a 20 min drive for me each way. Plus an hour session. I've learned that if I can go 2-3 times a week (instead of 7) and just eat healthy more often then not, my Bikini Body Guide (BBG) workouts and clean eating and LESS stress are WAY better for me then going to yoga all the time. It's my balance and what I've negotiated for my sanity
3. TV - confession: I love to watch a good soap opera episode (currently watching Vampire Diaries) before heading to bed. IDK why but it's relaxing to me. However, I've learned I'd rather journal, or play cards with the hubby or my extended family, to actually catch up with people. Sometimes you have to carve out time for others and honestly, doing that instead of my TV shows sometimes is the most relaxing, happiest thing I could do for myself
I know this is a random list, but I would love to hear how you outsource, what you maintain and what you sometimes are okay with not being perfect in order to design your own balance as a momma. Please share below!